Lil joke

A woman came home just in time to find her husband in bed with another woman.

With superhuman strength borne of fury, she dragged her husband down the stairs to the garage and put his penis in a vise.

She then secured it tightly and removed the handle. Next she picked up a hacksaw.

The husband terrified, screamed, "Stop! Stop! You're not going to......to....cut it off are you?!"

The wife, with a gleam of revenge in her eye, said, "Nope. You are. I'm going to set the garage on fire."

Hello bitches

I know it's been a long time I haven't updated here, but I acknowledge my mistake and I'm here to share the lastest news with you kids.

I arrived in my hometown on the 3rd of October and been on holidays until this very day. Been partying a little, seeing old friends, making new ones and that kinda shit you do when you haven't been to your family's in 2 years.

João Pessoa - Paraíba is the place I was born and bred, a beautiful place in the north-east of Brazil, actually the easternmost place in our continent. It has changed heaps since my last visit and I must tell you it looks way better.

Last week I decided to look for gyms so that I could keep in shape (or get back to it since I put on 5 kg/over 10 lb) and I got a gym I can workout and practise Muay Thai, but the one I found for MMA training was the most interesting spot as Sukata is coming from the UK sometime between now and next week cause he's training with us and fighting in a show on January 20th, apparently a really organized one that's gonna go live on paid TV and shit... pretty exciting, huh?The cool thing was that Jean invited me to take part on the show and fight a dude I started practising Jiu-jitsu with, in the same show as Sukata, in my hometown and getting paid for that, what else could I ask for?

Since I am going to fight at 60 kg/134 lb I'm not eating Xmas supper or get shitfaced on New Year's... I'll just blaze I suppose =)

My brother is a 9 yo beast, got his green belt on Karate the other day... I know, Karate right? But I have plenty of time to seduce him to something else as well. My family is fine too.

That's all I had to say, I believe. Happy days, son.

Epic Fighting MMA

Since all the softies are already in bed I decided to update the blog now.

Last weekend I learned I could fight this Friday at the Epic Fighting cause one of our boys pulled out due to a shoulder injury. He was gonna fight a kid on the145 division, and for some reason they changed it to 150 when I took it; turns out the kid was a little over the weight and couldn't even make it for 150. But I wouldn't pull out of a fight at this stage unless he got inside the cage with knifes in his gloves. Unfortunately I couldn't get the shorts with sponsors logo Marijuana Muscle and Aqua Hydrolyze 9 in time because it was such a short notice fight, sorry.

So fight starts I leg kick him and he rushes into a take down, we then clinched and I threw some knees, took him down and started beating his face... that was the first round. On the second one, I started throwing some trouble to him and he tried taking me down again, pressed him against the cage and got him down, he scrambled but I kept on top, tried to get up but I got the take down again and went for a rear naked choke, he scrambled again and I kept the position and left the submission to soften him up a little more. Third one was pretty much like the second, Pantcho told me to go for the submission and I got an arm bar locked in too late in the last round, but that didn't take party away.

I'm happy I had a good support from the Team Quest family: my corners, the Johnsons, Barbara, Steve, Manny, training partners, friends, housemates and sponsors. Unfortunately I let the adrenalin speak on the interview and no one will ever watch Eduardo douche-bag talking. I'll put the fight on line tho, wanna watch that again.

Pantcho and Washington cornered me really well then it made the fight way easier. I have to get the Jiu-jitsu sorted tho and get the finish next time.

At the moment, after partying a little bit I can say it's good to eat like a pig once again. Imma finish my beer and go to bed. MMA tryouts tomorrow babe, I'll be up for it.

Night bitches.

Mentally tough

There are good and bad days when on a training camp and definitely when you're injured the day tends to not be so great. The fact that I haven't been constantly pulling weights as I was in Brisbane influences a lot I believe. Should have got myself a push bike, something I must do once I'm back.

I hurt my shoulder on the MMA training, last Friday, but I started icing it as soon as it happened and haven't stopped ever since. So kept training and now it's alright, I went through the grappling session with no pain and I pushed to a moderate pace. Jackpot. I'll enjoy the two months in Brazil hitting the gym to get a little stronger and hell yeah, it's summer there bitches! Blaze by the beach, yes sir!

I haven't been taking easy this week tho, been training hard cause I got word I will be fighting on the 29th, in San Diego, so I gotta be ready.

Also this week we've had Gerard Mousasi coming with crew for some training with us. Very cool having the number 6 light heavyweight ranked by sherdog visiting Team Quest, he's working on a documentary so one of the guys was filming us (when I say us, I mean them as I don't practice with such heavy bastards) most of the time.

That's about it for the week so far. Also Heath's birthday, so happy birthday old man!

...

This week has been a tough one. I caught up with my conditioning, so I feel like myself again.

A few of our guys from the amateur team had fights in a local show, which name I have no knowledge of, in San Diego. I went there with a couple of my housemates and a mad 'guido' who is visiting us for the week. The fights gave me a good idea of what I'm about to face this month. There are two competitions I am trying to get in for my US debut, a one on the 22nd in Las Vegas with weigh ins the day before whereas the one on the 29th, in San Diego, have the weigh ins 6 hours before the event. So the rule is 135 to the Vegas compe and 145 for the San Diego one, easy.

Also I'll be going to Joao Pessoa in the end of the year, perhaps even in November. The plan is to visit the family and work a bit for cash to get back to Murrieta next year to fight again. I got a few things lined up, I'm pretty excited with the prospects.

As if I could update about how I am getting technique-wise I feel like I'm responding quicker to the situations and adapting to the game in order to finish the fight. I am confident and excited about the chance of fighting asap. I kind of injuried my shoulder last Friday but I couldn't care less. Ready for it.

Training, sweet training.

Spent the weekend in L.A. again with the Felicianos, we stayed at their mate and BJJ black belt Leandro Vieira, Leonardo Vieira's brother. It was cool, lots of pizza, sugar, cards and farts. This weekend I learnt that bitches can get pretty crazy when you are not interested and gyms owned by cunts is more common than I thought.

A couple of Brazilian friends came to California, one to coach BJJ and the other one to compete MMA. The gym's owner was pushing them to sign a pretty stupid contract in which there would tie them to the gym and take any equality in rights out of the game and all of this for shit money ( déjà vu), so wisely they decided not to stay, Robson was to leave by the end of the week as agreed and Baiano decided to come to Murrieta with us. The owner, then, calls the promoter to talk shit about Baiano who is to fight in their show and tells the other guy he doesn't have to come to work no more, but at least he paid him for the rest of the week in cash, which is pretty nice of him at least.

Trying to avoid poverty or chasing dreams, many Brazilians screw up by being nice and accepting to go through bullshit so that they can stay overseas and achieve what their skills can give them, not knowing how much they are really worth and I'm not talking about money, but it seems that for the money hungry worms if you do not step down and put a number on what you think you're worth it means you're an idiot and they can take advantage of you. to build their empire of bullshit and vanity. Not surprisingly this subject gives me the creeps, scumbags give me the creeps.

Leaving the cunts aside, I must say that training was quite rewarding. My conditioning is way better, my technique's still shit and my body sore but hey, I'm pretty fucking cool. regardless I'm leaving the real thing to the cage or at least that's my excuse and by the way, I can't wait to go up there and mess someone up pretty bad.

October 1st

I've been procrastinating as much as I could in regards to updating the blog, I don't have a lot of material as in photos/videos and also been lazy as.

My standup is improving, heard from Ed's mouth and I don't know if he'll ever say that again in this lifetime. Also got a knee to my face, fresh wound, and a few kicks to my thigh. Something people don't realise that most guys who kick ass in MMA shows is that those guys beat and get beat up in training. I've witnessed some guys from our team getting ready to fights they won and seeing them leaving the training frustrated for getting a beating. Being on the top of the chain and not getting spanked gives one a false sense of confidence, that trust me, I don't. My sense of confidence is very unstable.

I am not going to training today as I was suggested to rest my "injuries" so that I can perform better next week and even though I agree with that I'm feeling bad for not going. There are other reasons that I can't control but it's fucking annoying.

Next week Pantcho will get back to training and leave his drama aside (nah, seriously, his foot is still bad) and go work out as well and I'll be all over it training twice a day (again) and working out/swimming.

Tomorrow Pantcho is giving a seminar in the other Team Quest's gym and I'll be coming along and probably going to L.A. for the weekend. Not sure whether I'm going to L.A. yet, but if I do it will be hard to keep away from eating.

I'm starting Little Eddie's Special Fund, call 1 800 hot brazilian for donations, minimum of 1 G.